steve kwan user experience designer

Driving school

(January 7th, 2006 - 4:48PM)

I just got back from my first driving class. My parents signed me up for driving school after I got my learner's license (after seven years of refusing). It's a six and a half hour class on Saturday. Six and a half mind-numbing hours. I've got two more of those, and then I'm done the class component. From there, Steve goes on the road.

I can't say I'm horribly enthusiastic about car ownership. In fact, I've been avoiding it for so long that the whole thought of driving makes me uncomfortable. I'm so set in my ways by this point that actually being behind the wheel of a vehicle is a little frightening.

When we got to class we had to fill out a personal information and consent form. In the personal information section, I was supposed to enter the phone numbers for "Home 1" and "Home 2." I thought that was quite unusual; after all, how many people own two homes? Then the instructor - a very nice lady - explained that this is where you put your Mom's phone number and Dad's phone number if they live separately. If your parents live under the same roof, just fill in Home 1. It was then that I realized almost everyone in the class still lived with their parents. The thought that some of the students might be living independently, like I do, was not even a consideration. I am far too old to be learning how to drive.

There were a lot of cute girls in the class, but I couldn't go anywhere near them because that would violate the Golden Rule. Perhaps for my female readers, I should explain the Golden Rule. The Golden Rule, also known as the Don't Go To Jail Rule, is a formula that calculates the minimum age for women you can date.

The Golden Rule formula is:
HER AGE >= (YOUR AGE / 2) + 7

Let me provide an example. I am currently 23. Let's say that I'm interested in a 19-year-old. Can I date her? Well, let's plug the ages into the formula.

19 >= (23 / 2) + 7
19 >= 11.5 + 7
19 >= 18.5

The formula holds! So I can date her, because her age is greater than or equal to my age divided by two plus seven. Let's give another example: I want to date an 18-year-old.

18 >= (23 / 2) + 7
18 >= 11.5 + 7
18 >= 18.5

The formula does not hold. This girl is too young so I can't date her.

So as I was saying, going out with most of the girls in my driving course would violate the Golden Rule. Perhaps I should take a course with girls more my age. Something that girls would be interested in, like marketing or psychology. I imagine these would be prime picking grounds.